Claim: Dairy is not necessary for a healthy diet and may be harmful to one's health.
Reasons:
- lactose intolerance
- growth hormones
- antibiotics
- contributes to
- cancer
- obesity
- allergies
- heart disease
- calcium deficiency
Thesis statement: Dairy is not necessary for a healthy diet and may be harmful to one's health in that dairy contributes to cancer, heart disease, obesity, allergies, and other detrimental health concerns.
I think you have a good thesis statment. I liked how you started listing only a couple reasons why dairy is bad for your health, just so that will pull the reader in.
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